|Wooden's Wisdom - Volume 12
|Craig Impelman Speaking | Championship Coaches | Champion's Leadership Library Login
"DON’T LET DIFFERENT IDEAS HURT YOUR FEELINGS." (MARGARET THATCHER)
John Wooden Video Clip (4 min. 6 sec.): Coach Wooden is asked: "Please share how you decided to bring your coaching career to a close." Long clip….great story!
Margaret Thatcher was a British politician and stateswoman who served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom from 1979 to 1990. She was the first female British prime minister and the longest-serving British prime minister of the 20th century.
Thatcher described her communication philosophy this way: "I love argument, I love debate. I don’t expect anyone just to sit there and agree with me, that’s not their job."
Not surprisingly, this was identical to Coach Wooden’s approach with his coaching staff.
We should embrace debate and different ideas from others. We should not be personally offended because somebody disagrees with us. Coach Wooden called this "disagreeing without being disagreeable". Tim Cook, the CEO of Apple, says he has learned "to not take things personally that are not meant to be personal."
When other people are worried about "hurting your feelings" they are not going to give you their best ideas or coaching. When folks are worried about "offending each other" the communication is not going to be as good as it could be. At the same time, we should always be polite and courteous.
Margaret Thatcher had several great quotes on the value of good disagreeable disagreement:
"Do you know that one of the great problems of our age is that we are governed by people who care more about feelings than they do about thoughts and ideas."
"When I’m out of politics I’m going to run a business, it’ll be called rent-a-spine"
"I seem to smell the stench of appeasement in the air."
"To wear your heart on your sleeve isn’t a very good plan; you should wear it inside, where it functions best."
"If you just set out to be liked, you will be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and would achieve nothing."
Do you love a great debate?
Yours in Coaching,
The Little Hurts
Every night she runs to me
Edgar Albert Guest (1881-1959)
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