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Issue 207 - Let us Overcome the Angry Man with Gentleness, the Evil Man with Goodness, the Miser with Generosity, the Liar with Truth

Woodens Wisdom
Wooden's Wisdom - Volume 4 Issue 207
Craig Impelman Speaking |  Championship Coaches |  Champion's Leadership Library Login



In his book Coach Wooden's Pyramid of Success, with Jay Carty, Coach describes one of his first lessons about the power of overcoming anger with gentleness:
When I was a young boy, I was at a gravel pit with my father and a young man. They had a team of horses and were attempting to pull a load up a steep road.
The young man driving the horses was loud and abusive. In response, the animals were agitated, worked against each other and couldn’t pull the load.
With a gentle voice and a gentler touch, my dad calmed the horses and walked them forward with the load. It was an incredible reminder that gentleness can fix in a moment what an hour of shouting fails to achieve.
The example of his father led Coach to understand that anger avoidance by disagreeing agreeably was one of the keys to a successful marriage. In his book A Lifetime of Observations and Reflections on and Off the Court, with Steve Jamison, Coach described it this way:
Very early, Nellie and I understood that there would be times when we disagreed, but there would never be times when we had to be disagreeable.
We kept to that rule for over half a century.
Whether it is in the workplace or at home, we should remember, as Coach liked to say: You cannot antagonize and influence at the same time.
If the other person is angry and has a bad tone of voice we must be mindful not to match that tone but rather respond with gentleness.
The idea: Let us overcome the angry man with gentleness is credited to The Mahabharata, a Hindu text from 400 B.C.
It is as true today as it was then.

Yours in Coaching,
Craig Impelman
Twitter: @woodenswisdom




Watch Video

Application Exercise

Favorite Poetry




A team can lose. Any team can lose.

But in a sense, a very real sense a coach never loses.

For the job of a coach is over and finished once the starting whistle blows. They know they've won or lost before play starts.

For a coach has two tasks. The minor one is to teach skills: to teach a child how to run faster, hit harder, block better, kick farther, jump higher.

The second task: the major task is to make grown-ups out of children.

It’s to teach an attitude of mind. It’s to implant character and not simply impart skills.

It’s to teach children to play fair. This goes without saying. It's to teach them to be humble in victory and proud in defeat. This goes without saying.

But more importantly it’s to teach them to live up to their potential no matter what their potential is.

It’s to teach them to do their best and never be satisfied with what they are. But to strive to be as good as they can be if they tried harder.

A coach can never make a great player out of a child who isn’t potentially great. But they can make a great competitor out of anyone. And miraculously they can make a grown-up out of a child.

For a coach, the final score doesn’t read so many points for my team, so many points for theirs. Instead it reads: so many grown-ups out of so many children.

And this is the score that is never published. And this is the score that they read to themselves and in which they find their real joy when the last game is over.







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